


LYRICALLY, OLICITY

by lizzybennettdarcy



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-15
Updated: 2015-08-15
Packaged: 2018-04-14 20:00:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,952
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4577991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lizzybennettdarcy/pseuds/lizzybennettdarcy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A random assortment of one-shots inspired by the lyrics that inspire me. Rating and category may vary from chapter to chapter. Spoilers through the end of season 2.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. ALL ABOUT US

_Take my hand, I'll teach you to dance._

_I'll spin you around, won't let you fall down._

_Would you let me lead? You can step on my feet._

_Give it a try, it'll be alright_

Oliver's eyes burned with that same unknown emotion that was ever-present in most of their interactions. She nibbled on her lip as she once again tried to identify just what he was feeling, but she was quickly distracted as his eyes focused on the lip between her teeth.

"Oliver, what are you doing here?"

He  _had_ just crawled in through her window after all. She had been curled up on her couch watching Doctor Who when she heard him popping the lock on the window. Jumping to her feet, she watched as Oliver Queen slid through the window and stood before her.

She wondered vaguely if any of her neighbours had seen the former billionaire breaking and entering into her home. A smirk skittered across her lips. Times certainly had to be tough if  _he_ was breaking into condos.

Which led her back to  _what_ he was doing here and  _why_ he was just staring at her.

"Oliver?" She prodded with a raise brow.

His mouth popped open for a moment before he pressed his lips together and looked away. She frowned and stepped closer to him. His gaze remained on a place above her shoulder. She reached out and grasped his hand with her own. He tensed beneath her touch momentarily but relaxed with a sigh.

"Oliver." She whispered.

He blinked slowly before his blue eyes burned into hers. Felicity's pulse quickened and she took a step closer. His free hand landed on her hip.

"You're so beautiful." He breathed out. Felicity fought to keep from scoffing. She was wearing Scooby Doo pajamas. " _So_ beautiful."

She exhaled loudly. "Oliver, I'm a little confused."

"I had a fight with Laurel tonight." He admitted. That wasn't what she was expecting.

She frowned and made to take a step back but he held fast. He shook his head and she froze in his arms. "I've waited for her to know my secret, to know  _me_. And now she thinks she does. She knows my secrets." His jaw ticked. "She wanted to give us another try and-"

"That's great, Oliver. Really." She told him through gritted teeth, her eyes on his forehead.

"Felicity. Fe-li-ci-tyy." He waited until her stinging eyes met his. "She doesn't have my heart. Do you understand?"

His familiar words sparked something within her.  _Do you understand?_

"Oh." She replied. His lips tilted upwards briefly before that unknown emotion once again burned within his blue orbs.

She reached up and cupped his cheek as she stared deeply into his eyes. He was  _afraid_.

"I  _don't_ know how to  _do_ this." He admitted fiercely. "I've already hurt you so many times. And it's not like any of my other relationships have exactly worked out."

She felt a smile stretch her lips as her thumb brushed along his cheekbone. He was  _here_. Even though he was afraid, he was  _here_ with her.

"Do you trust me?" She asked him.

His eyes narrowed. "Of  _course_ I do. I trust you more than anyone else." He growled.

Felicity grinned. Raising herself onto her toes, she pressed her lips against his softly. His mouth opened in surprise and she stepped back.

"We'll do this together. Just like everything else." She promised, eyes earnest.

She watched as Oliver considered her words. After several seconds his lips lifted in that special smile that had always been reserved just for her.

"Deal."

And they sealed it with a kiss.

_The room's hush hush and now's our moment._

_Take it in, feel it all and hold it_

_Eyes on you, eyes on me._

_We're doing this right._

His fingers were tangled through hers tightly as they walked into Queen Consolidated for the first time in seventeen months. His chin was raised and his smile was for show. But the thumb brushing across her knuckles was real.

The shocked silence gave way to applause as Oliver Queen made his triumphant return as CEO. Felicity beamed beside him as he stopped and thanked the staff with a wave.

The two of them walked through the crowd, ignoring the whispers about the CEO and his 'secretary'. They stepped into the executive elevator and Oliver placed a kiss on her cherry red lips.

"You did it, Oliver." She mumbled against his mouth.

He chuckled, dropping a kiss to her forehead. " _We_ did it, Felicity."

She smiled up at him adoringly, wiping the lipstick from the corner of his mouth. The elevator dinged and the doors opened.

Three hours later she would find him hunched over his new, old desk, eyes blank and lips pursed. Mountains of paperwork loomed before him.

"Tell me  _why_ I wanted this company back?" He wondered with just the tiniest hint of a whine.

Felicity simply laughed and stepped behind his chair. He groaned as her hands began to massage the knots in his shoulders.

They both preferred this new working situation.

_'Cause lovers dance when they're feeling in love_

_Spotlight's shining. It's all about us_

_It's oh, oh, all_

_About uh, uh, us_

_And every heart in the room will melt_

_This is a feeling I've never felt_

_But it's all about us_

She would never tire of dancing with Oliver Queen.

The two of them had shared many a platonic dance during their time as partners. Many missions called for a little undercover schmoozing of the rich and guilty. Oliver had also stopped bringing dates to their work functions and always asked for at least once dance.

There was something so much  _more_ about dancing with Oliver Queen,  _boyfriend_. His hands gripped her just a little bit tighter, his arms holding her so much closer. They were able to enjoy the intimacy of the act without worrying about the gossip of the people surrounding them.

Her cheek was pressed against his heart and she listened to it beat in time with the song they danced to. His thumb brushed along her spine softly and she sighed into his jacket.

She caught sight of Thea watching them from their table with Roy. The younger Queen was beaming. Felicity's chest tightened as she noticed the joy within Oliver's sister. Thea had been through so much and they'd barely gotten her back from Malcolm. To see her looking so  _happy_ meant the world to Felicity.

It appeared that the sight of Oliver's happiness meant the world to Thea as well.

_Suddenly I'm feeling brave_

_Don't know what's got into me_

_Why I feel this way_

_Can we dance real slow?_

_Can I hold you real close?_

He caught Thea's eye over Felicity's head and felt lighter than he had in years. She was  _happy_. God, his beautiful sister was finally  _happy_.

And so was he. He had never thought he could have it all. He had never believed that he  _deserved_ it. And yet here he stood, with the most incredible woman in his arms. His best friend was happily married with the most beautiful son, Oliver and Felicity's godson. And Thea was home,  _safe_ and she knew everything about the people who mattered most to her.

His hold tightened around Felicity and his lips brushed the top of her blond curls. She molded her body to his and sighed peacefully.

He had no idea what he'd do without her. How he'd lived before her. He had been  _so_ afraid to allow her closer, to really be with her. He hadn't trusted himself with her heart, but she had trusted him enough for the both of them. And they'd done it together, the way she'd told him they would. The way they'd done everything since he'd walked into her office with that busted laptop and a mouthful of lies.

He loved her.  _God,_ he loved her. He hadn't thought he was even  _capable_ of loving after everything he'd gone through, everything he'd  _done._ But he did. He had never loved anyone the way he loved her.

He just had to figure out how to tell her.

_Do you hear that love? They're playing our song_

_Do you think we're ready yet? Oh, I'm really feeling it_

_Do you hear that love? Do you hear that love?_

"We don't have a song." Felicity remarked from where she sat on top of the med table.

He chuckled as he cleaned the small cut on her forehead and taped a bandage over the wound. His thumb traced the edges of the bandage thoughtfully before dropping a hand. "We have a song." He replied, balling up the medical clothes and gloves and tossing them in the garbage can.

He turned back to face her and she found herself once again wondering how one man could be  _so_ beautiful. "We don't."

He shook his head at her stubbornness.

Her brows furrowed. "Since when?"

Oliver's lips twisted in embarrassment and she swore a faint blush stained his cheeks.

"Which one?" She wondered when he didn't answer her.

Oliver reached for his phone and tapped on the screen for a few times before music filled the lair. It was beautiful to be certain but she didn't understand why or when it had become  _their_ song.

"We were dancing to this song when I realised I'm in love with you."

Felicity's lips fell open in surprise. They hadn't exchanged 'I love you's' yet. They'd been officially dating for ten months but neither had rushed to say the words.

He loved her.

"Felicity?" he prodded nervously.

Her eyes widened.

"Sorry! I spaced out." He chuckled. "I love you too. Oh, Oliver. I love you so much."

He stepped between her knees and cupped her cheeks. "I think maybe I've loved you all along."

_'Cause lovers dance when they're feeling in love_

_Spotlight's shining. It's all about us_

_It's oh, oh, all (about us)_

_Hey, hey, hey_

_(And every heart in the room will melt)_

_This is a feeling I've never felt_

_But it's all, it's all about us_

She wore white. Thea and Lyla wore fuchsia. Roy and Dig wore matching suits.

And, Oliver was of course, a vision in black.

Looking back, she would have a hard time recalling the ceremony or the vows. She didn't remember the food or the wedding band. She struggled to recall any details aside from the blinding happiness that had smothered her on that day.

When people asked her about her wedding, she would tell them about their first dance as man and wife. She'd describe the way his hands burned through the fabric of her dress. She'd tell them about the way his eyes lit up with inexpressible joy as he twirled her around the dance floor. She'd recall the way Oliver quietly sang the lyrics to their song into her ear in the low timbre only  _she_ had ever heard.

Their wedding wasn't the end of the story, but a new beginning. And they would face everything else together.

They always had.

_This is a feeling I've never felt_

_But it's all, it's all about us_

 


	2. DANCE WITH SOMEBODY

_I wanna dance with somebody_

_I wanna feel the heat with somebody_

_Yeah, I wanna dance with somebody_

_With somebody who loves me_

Oliver Queen leaned against the bar and raised his wineglass to his lips. The pull of his suit jacket was now unfamiliar and he did his best to ignore the discomfort that he felt with the tie wrapped around his collar. He savoured the flavour of the red wine as it filled his mouth. Felicity had chosen well.

"Mr. Queen." William Branson acknowledged him as he passed by with a nod. Oliver nodded back, amusement hidden as the elderly gentleman paraded his 'wife of the month' around the ballroom. The man certainly wasn't Oliver's favorite board member but he had been influential in bringing Oliver back into Queen Consolidated. He was a shrewd businessman and he'd been a good friend of Moira's. His taste for young blondes and smoking jackets brought to mind Hugh Hefner rather than Donald Trump. Though, he supposed that he would take support wherever he could.

It had not been an easy year.

After the dust had settled, Starling City had been a different place. The corruption in the Mayor's office had caused outrage amongst the populace. The details of Isabel's part in the 'Starling Riot' had only been revealed to the public recently. Oliver knew that Felicity Smoak had carefully leaked the details online. He knew that she was the real reason he was once again the CEO of his father's company.

Upon learning of Isabel's involvement in not only the riot but also in Moira Queen's death, the media had clamoured to support the only remaining Queen in Starling City. Demands had been made of the ailing QC as stockholders threatened to bail out.

He had only been CEO for two weeks now. This fundraiser was his first official event since he'd been renamed as CEO. Felicity had been busy for the past two weeks planning and organizing the event down to the last detail.

His eyes roamed the room in search of his blond assistant. She had been buzzing around speaking with all of the important investors and guests for several hours now. A flash of green caught his eye and a smile graced his lips as he found her.

She was stunning. She'd chosen an arrow-green floor-length gown with black lace embellishments and no back. Her long blond curls hung loosely against her bare back and shoulders. Her makeup was light and her lips were painted a brilliant red.

She'd had the attention of every male since she'd first arrived to the party.

The woman was a Godsend.

The last year had been a test upon the team and on the two of them in particular. Oliver had gone to work for A.R.G.U.S as he worked to get his family's company back. Felicity had begun doing contract IT work and John had become a driver for a wealthy family with adorable twin girls. Gone were the days where the three of them worked together day and night.

And he'd missed it.

The call from the acting CEO of Queen Consolidated and the prompt job offer upon his arrival had been a relief. But as he stood in the office that had once been his, he'd wondered how he could possibly do it without his team. There had been days before Slade's return where he needed Felicity and John more in that office than he did in the Foundry or on the streets.

He'd been sitting in his old chair, staring out at the city when a familiar sound greeted him. His head swivelled to face her old desk as the sound of high heels clattered towards him. A grin stretched his face as she walked through her former office and into his. His face must have shown surprise as she snorted and placed her hands on her hips.

"What? You thought you could actually do this without me?" She had teased, brows raised.

He'd simply shaken his head, sure that his words would betray him in that moment.

He watched as she moved from a particularly curmudgeonly investor to speak with the CFO's assistant. Felicity threw back her head and laughed at something the woman had said and Oliver's breathing stuttered. Her curls brushed against the naked skin of her lower back and his fingers twitched.

Shaking his head, he turned back towards the bar. Catching the bartender's eye, he said. "I need something a little bit stronger, I think."

The bartender grinned and handed him a scotch, on the rocks. Without tasting it, he knew that Felicity would have ordered only his favorite scotch. He wasn't disappointed as the familiar liquid burned a path down to his chest.

His eyes remained on her and he wondered if he looked as predatory as he felt in that moment. The fact that the men in the room had only looked and never approached her seemed to confirm his suspicions.

Logically he knew that he had very little right to feel possessive of the beautiful blond woman. She'd given him the opportunity more than once. He was a coward though, and had only smiled as she rambled on about his declaration of love and how real it had seemed.

The orchestra struck up another tune and Oliver found himself crossing the room. He placed his hand on the patch of exposed skin that he'd been staring at for several hours and pulled her to his side. Felicity's friend left immediately and Oliver's hand turned Felicity into his body. Her hand had reached out to rest on his chest without conscious thought. Her brows were puckered in concern and Oliver had the sudden urge to kiss the concern away.

"Is something wrong?" She asked, tone laced with worry. "Roy said that he could cover for you tonight and-"

Oliver shook his head and led her onto the dance-floor. "Dance with me."

It wasn't a question but it stopped just shy of being a demand. His thumb brushed against her spine for a moment before her frown faded and she placed her free hand in his. His eyes met hers and he began to lead them in a slow waltz.

"This is my favorite song."

Oliver's lips twitched upwards. "I know."

The smile that his words elicited was blinding. Not for the first time he wondered just how on earth he'd found her.

"You're beautiful." He told her solemnly.

Her eyes sparkled and he knew that his wording hadn't gone unnoticed. She wasn't just beautiful tonight in her green ball-gown. She was beautiful in the lair with her ponytail and sweaters. She was gorgeous in the office in her 'secretary skirts' and she was beautiful in the pjs she slept in every night.

"So are you." She replied dreamily, giving him only a moment to smirk before shaking her head. "I mean, well you  _are_ actually kind of beautiful. But we both know you're ridiculously masculine and manly and um hot? Wow, it's a little warm in here."

A chuckle rumbled deep within his chest as he pulled her closer. She dropped his gaze and rested her cheek against his shoulder. A sigh escaped her lips as his fingers brushed tenderly against the bare skin of her spine.

One dance turned into two and after several long minutes, everyone in the room stopped keeping track. As Oliver swayed with Felicity in his arms he realised that  _this_ was everything he'd ever wanted. And as her fingers absently scratched at the base of his scalp he decided that he was done fighting it, fighting  _her_. His eyes caught Dig's and the two of them shared an understanding smile. Dig nodded in approval before taking his leave.

The night was winding down and the guests had begun to trickle out. Oliver pulled away from Felicity after the last song ended and tangled his fingers through her own. The two of them made their way through the thinning crowd and headed for the exit. No words were spoken as he helped her into the black car, though he never dropped her hand. Dig was silent as he drove them towards Felicity's apartment.

Oliver's hand covered the smooth skin of her lower back as the elevator stopped on her floor and they walked towards her door. Felicity unlocked her door before turning to face him. She smiled softly up at him as he reached out to cup her cheek gently.

"Tonight was a success, huh?" Her words were disarming and he found himself grinning.

"You'd make quite the event planner, Miss Smoak." He replied with a wink.

His smile dropped as his thumb brushed across her cheek. His gaze fell to her lips. "It wasn't a lie."

"Hmm?" Felicity hummed in question as she enjoyed the feeling of his hand on her cheek.

"What I said, last year. In the mansion." He clarified. His eyes rose to meet her now alert gaze. "It wasn't a lie. Slade did take the wrong woman."

Felicity frowned. "I asked you about it. On the island."

Oliver gave her a sad half-smile. His hands cupped her face softly. "I wasn't ready. It was too much. But-" He paused, searching for courage.

"But?" She breathed out hopefully.

"I'm ready now."

Felicity's hands fisted in the lapels of his tuxedo jacket. "You are?"

He took a deep breath and nodded. "I loved you then and I love you now, Felicity."

A breathy sob passed through her lips as tears fell from her eyes and over his hands. "I love you too, Oliver. I always have."

The tension that had filled his chest for the past eight years loosened. He felt moisture gathering in his own eyes as he leaned down and pressed his lips against hers.

"Hey, Oliver?" She whispered as she snuggled deeper into his chest.

"Yeah?" His fingers traced mindless patterns against her naked skin.

Felicity pressed her lips against his tattoo, against his heart. Oliver closed his eyes and revelled in the feeling of it. The last several hours had been everything, and still not enough. He could spend the rest of his life in her arms and still need more.

"What changed?" She asked finally.

Oliver smoothed a hand over her curls as he thought over his answer. Even now he wasn't entirely sure. Nothing had changed per se. She had been his right hand from the first moment they'd met. He'd seen and coveted her light from the beginning. She'd been beautiful even before he'd first seen her. She'd worn green before and she'd dazzled the pants off of everyone she'd come across.

And yet he'd finally given in.

"It was your favorite song." He answered at last. "And before I knew it, I was touching that patch of skin I'd been staring at for hours and I was pulling you onto the dance-floor. Nothing changed, not really. It's always been there. I just didn't fight it this time. I'm sorry it took me so long."

Felicity reached up and traced her finger over his eyebrows. "I'm not. I wasn't ready back then either."

Oliver pulled her closer and wondered where he'd be without Felicity Smoak. A little snore escaped her lips and he buried his grin amongst her curls.

It didn't really matter. He was here now.

_I wanna dance with somebody_

_With somebody who loves me_

 


	3. DON'T DENT IT

_When you swore not to love again_

_But you know you will_

_Don't deny it_

Oliver jogged down the steps and rounded the corner. Despite their best efforts their new homebase had yet to feel like  _home_. Felicity jokingly called it the den, but her tone always lacked the joy it had carried whenever she'd referred to the foundry.

With a sigh he placed his bow in its new case and removed his mask. Muffled sounds of conversation filtered through the room as he hung up his hood and headed towards the bathroom to change into his everyday clothes. He passed Felicity on the way and she raised a hand in greeting before turning away from him and pressing her phone closer to her ear.

It had been three months since they'd defeated Slade. Three months since his sister had disappeared into the wind.

Oliver dressed quickly and returned to the main room of their basement hideout. His eyes searched the space, finding only Felicity sitting in front of her desk. She was staring into space as she ended the phone call.

"Where's Dig?" He wondered, leaning against her desk.

Felicity jumped in surprise and shook her head. "He had a date with Lyla. He left an hour ago."

Oliver stared down at the woman before him and noticed how tired she looked.

"Who was on the phone?" He asked finally.

It wasn't any of his business and she'd be within her rights to tell him so. But she seemed tired and her face was a model of conflicting emotions.

"Central City Gen." She replied, typing a string of code into her computer. "Barry is awake."

Oliver frowned. He'd expected excitement and joy to accompany this news. Barry had been in a coma for eight months and he knew that it had weighed heavily on Felicity.

"Oh. That's good." He paused, shoving down the bitterness that welled within him "Do you need a ride to the train station?"

Felicity glanced away from her computer screen and regarded him suspiciously. His admittedly unwarranted dislike of Felicity's  _friend_ was clearly on her mind. She shook her head finally and turned back to her computer.

"No, I'm sure Iris will call me if he needs anything." She mumbled after several moments of silence.

Oliver noted the slump of her shoulders and crossed his arms over his chest. "Who's Iris?"

Felicity's fingers hesitated over the keyboard for only the smallest of moments but he caught it. "Barry's girlfriend."

Oliver's jaw snapped shut. Barry Allen had a girlfriend? Anger pulsed through his veins as he remembered the way that the young man had unabashedly pursued Oliver's lovely assistant. He should have strangled him when he had the chance. Or, strangled him  _again_.

"Barry didn't have a girlfriend when he was here, did he?" His question was a growl and Felicity's lips twitched in response.

He watched carefully as her amusement drained from her face. She sighed. "Yeah well, he and Iris were high school sweethearts or something." She snorted. "Nothing like life and death situations to bring romantic feelings to the forefront." Oliver stiffened even before she realised her words. "I mean." She blew out a breath. "For them, obviously. Not for others. Well, I suppose that it happens to others as well. It's a much beloved plot device on television and in movies. So I guess it happens in fiction as well. Just not in all cases. Not in real life cases. Not always. Because in some cases there  _aren't_ romantic feelings. Not real ones I mean." His jaw was tight as he watched her blow out another breath and bury her head in her hands.

"Felicity," He wondered just how long he'd been saying her name like that. Had he always whispered it with such reverence?

"Please, just don't. I'm tired and therefore my brain isn't at its best. Barry's awake and I'm happy for him. And if he found epic true love with Iris then I'm happy about that too." She rambled into her hands. "I don't need another romantic pep talk,  _especially_  from you." Her breath caught as the last words fell past her lips but she didn't continue.

Oliver closed his eyes. He supposed that it  _would_ be particularly unpleasant for her to hear another 'well maybe he's dreaming about you' type speech from him again. Things had shifted between the two of them since the words he'd spoken in the mansion. He realised now that it probably would have been a good idea to actually  _tell_ her beforehand what the plan was. A simple 'do you trust me?' hadn't prepared either of them for the words he'd spoken before the fireplace.

They were still partners and they were still friends. She dedicated her nights to helping him save the city. He'd be lying if he said he didn't miss having her around during the day as well though.

"I need to get home. Amanda wants a new string of code from me tomorrow night and I didn't get it done while you were on patrol." Felicity announced as she busied herself with gathering her things. It didn't escape his notice that she never once met his eyes or that her own were a little bit red. "See you tomorrow."

"Goodnight." He replied softly as he watched her walk up the stairs and out of sight.

He still wasn't thrilled that she was working with A.R.G.U.S but he knew that it was the best of a bad situation. He had done her a rather unforeseen injustice by moving her from the IT department to become his EA. She had no reasonable excuse for her change in job and therefore many companies hadn't been interested in hiring her. The job offer from Waller was convenient, if only because she knew about Felicity's after-work responsibilities.

Oliver sat heavily in her chair and tapped his finger against the armrest. He couldn't pretend to be upset that Barry Allen was no longer a romantic option for Felicity. And he wondered just what that said about him. He wasn't unaware of his own feelings for the blond genius. He'd known from their first meeting that she was special, different. He'd seen her attraction and growing feelings for him as they had arisen. Oliver knew that Felicity Smoak could and  _would_ make him happy without a shadow of a doubt. And yet he found himself pushing her away time and time again.

He had hurt her when he'd told her he loved her in the mansion. Not because he hadn't meant the words, but because he had. He had never been able to lie to her and she'd known the truth of his words.

She deserved better than to be faced with him smiling painfully, silently, as she confronted him about it on the beach. She deserved the truth or at least some semblance of it.

But they had simply gone back to the status quo upon their return to Starling. She still rushed to 'play doctor' whenever he returned from a patrol injured. He still grasped her elbow or gripped her shoulder whenever they spoke. He continued to look for her approval before making any big decisions.

Nothing had changed. Barring of course the fact that a small flash of disappointment appeared in her eyes whenever he let go of her. Or the fact that his gaze followed her movements more frequently now.

She deserved better.

Oliver climbed the stairs and moments later he found himself cruising towards her home on his bike. He parked against the curb and without any thought to how late it was, jogged up the steps and knocked loudly on her door.

He heard movement in the condo before a light flicked on in the foyer. He did his best not to fidget as she glanced through the peephole. The door swung open to reveal a sleepy Felicity Smoak in Doctor Who pajamas.

"Oliver? What are you doing here?" She asked, voice thick with sleep.

Oliver's eyes traced the blond curls that cascaded down her bare shoulders and the freckles on her nose. He studied the gentle curve of her lips and the perfection of her skin before finding her tired blue eyes.

"Barry Allen isn't the only man in the world, Felicity. And maybe Iris is the love of his life and maybe she isn't. But he's not the last guy who's ever going to see just how special you are." He promised vehemently.

Felicity shook her head and dropped her eyes. "Oliver, I don't really-"

"No, just listen. This isn't a pep talk. This isn't me trying to make you feel better. This is me, telling you, that you're remarkable. There's no one in the world like you, Felicity Smoak." His finger reached out and tipped her chin upwards until she met his gaze once more. "I am never going to be good enough for you. But that doesn't mean I don't want to be."

Her eyebrows furrowed and her lips opened on a pout. "Oliver, what-"

" _No one_ will ever be good enough for you. But some day,  _someday_  I'll be ready to try." He told her solemnly. "I can't ask you to wait. I  _won't_ ask you to wait. It's why I can't repeat those words to you, not yet. Because you, Felicity Smoak, deserve all of the happiness in the world. And I'm not ready to be the man who can give it to you. Not yet."

Felicity folded her arms across her chest. "I won't wait for you, Oliver Queen. You pull me to you and push me away and I can't sit around,  _hoping_ that you'll stop." A smile crossed her lips. "But the thing is, because of the life I lead, I'm a very busy woman, and I don't get a lot of time to date. Plus there's the whole secret life thing that complicates  _everything_."

His mouth curled into a grin and he pulled her onto the doorstep and into his arms. She relaxed into him and he rested his cheek against the crown of her curls.

"Hey, Felicity?" He mumbled against her hair.

"Yes?" She sighed against his throat.

"Barry is an idiot."

She laughed and the movement warmed his heart. "So are you."

A chuckle slipped past his lips and his arms held her tighter. "Fair enough."

"Hey, Oliver?" She stepped away from him with a grin on her face.

"Yes, Felicity?" He replied, ignoring the loss he felt as she slipped from his arms and walked backwards towards her door.

"I happen to think you're pretty great already." She stepped inside and gripped the door. "And you're worth the wait."

She winked and closed the door. A startled laugh burst from his chest before he turned on his heel and headed down to his bike.

As he drove into the night he realised he was one step closer to the forever he'd only ever dreamed of.

_When you swore not to love again_

_But you know you will_

_Don't deny it_

 


	4. I DON'T WANNA LOVE SOMEBODY ELSE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not 100% happy with this one. I love the song (I don't want to love somebody else by A Great Big World) and I had a pretty clear idea of some parts of this story. I'm just not sure about the end result.
> 
> This is also my first foray into third person omniscient and I'm not sure how much I like it. I usually switch perspectives after page breaks and never in the middle of scenes. I'm a big fan of third person limited. So let me know what you think? Anyways, I hope you enjoy it. It's different from my other stuff.
> 
> Rated T for a wee bit of swearing.
> 
> Enjoy! I own nothing (including Arrow or the lyrics that I shamelessly lifted and actually placed in dialogue). Listen to the song though. It'll change your world.

_Well I don't care if loneliness kills me_

_I don't wanna love somebody else_

Felicity's fingers smoothed out the lines of her gown as she waited for the bartender to fix her drink. The galas of the rich and famous had never been her favorite facet of being Oliver Queen's EA.

She shouldn't complain. For a while there it had really looked like they wouldn't get the company back. It hadn't helped matters that Oliver couldn't afford the legal fees to fight for his namesake.

"Here you go, Miss." Felicity smiled kindly up at the good-looking man who had made her drink and raised the straw to her ruby red lips. Placing a napkin with his number before her, he winked at her and moved on to help the others who were gathered around the bar. She considered the napkin for a moment before moving her eyes over the thirsty, well-dressed partygoers. She caught Dig's eye and he smiled at her in commiseration. He hated these functions more than she did. He was standing by the doors with the other 'black drivers'.

A familiar sharp peal of laughter echoed across the room and Felicity's eyes searched for the source. A sigh crossed her lips when her gaze landed upon the beautiful brunette in a form-fitting red gown. Felicity's attention moved from the woman's dress to the arm that her gloved hand was clutching.

He was a remarkably attractive man. He always had been. There had never been a moment over the course of their relationship that Felicity hadn't found him breathtakingly beautiful.

Tonight was no exception. Clad in Armani, triumphant in his return to the helm of Queen Consolidated, Oliver Queen was a vision.

And he and Laurel Lance were as picture perfect as they had always been. Felicity dropped her gaze before Oliver noticed her attentions. Her fingers dragged the straw around her drink, the ice clinking delicately against the sides of the glass.

"Felicity." Her head jerked up, a mask concealing her thoughts as Richard Smith stepped up to her side.

"Richard." She returned politely. She raised her drink to her mouth and ignored the way that his eyes caressed her body.

Handsome though he was, Richard was twelve years her senior. He was dull in the way she'd come to associate with the QC accounting department. Despite his high position in the company, he wasn't a pompous man.

Felicity assessed him critically for a moment as he blathered on about that week's stock figures. His hair was light brown and his lips were plump. His nose was a little long but his eyes were kind. He wore his business suit well.

She glanced away from him and over to Oliver and Laurel surreptitiously. She nodded along to what Richard was saying, nibbling on her bottom lip as Laurel pulled Oliver out onto the dance-floor. She watched as the eldest Lance placed a hand on his shoulder before turning back to smile sadly at Richard.

Her hand went back to stirring the drink in front of her.

Oliver's jaw was beginning to ache as his lips stretched into yet  _another_ fake smile. The woman at his side did little to improve his mood.

He was being churlish, he knew. He was lucky to have the company back. Lucky to be the CEO of the company that his parents worked so hard to build. The idle chit-chat and pleasantries were certainly a small price to pay.

A flash of blue caught his attention and he watched as Felicity Smoak pulled herself up onto a barstool and flashed a pretty smile at the bartender. Through narrowed eyes, he watched as the man flirted with her while mixing her drink. His jaw snapped shut loudly as he watched the bartender write something on a napkin and hand it to Felicity with her drink. When Felicity didn't immediately toss aside the napkin, Oliver fought to redirect his attention to the woman at his side. Laurel's mouth was moving rapidly and he realised that he hadn't been aware of it.

"The man actually believed that he could talk his way out of it! Can you believe it, Ollie?" She finished dramatically.

Oliver's lips twitched upwards in a grimace. "Didn't know who he was dealing with. Obviously."

Laurel threw back her head and laughed loudly, her hand clutching his arm as her body shook with amusement. Oliver sighed quietly and brought the tumbler of scotch to his lips.

Laurel's laughter had trailed off but her hand had yet to leave his arm. His eyes darted across the room again. Annoyance bubbled within his chest as  _Dick_ Smith leaned into Felicity's space, eyes moving unabashedly over her figure.

It wasn't that he didn't see the appeal. She was stunning. That shade of blue against the creamy hue of her bared skin and the bright red lipstick she'd chosen for the occasion was  _very_ appealing. She'd chosen contacts and her blond hair hung around her bare shoulders in loose curls.

He himself had painstakingly followed the lines of the gown and the way the material hugged her feminine curves. But unlike  _Dick,_ he'd been subtle about it. Not looking her up and down like they were standing in a brothel instead of a fucking ballroom.

"Ollie?" Laurel's voice twisted its way through the haze of rage that he'd settled into. He shook his head lightly and glanced down at his ex. She was smiling brightly up at him. "Would you like to dance?"

Was there really a polite way to say no? She grasped his hand and pulled him onto the dance floor, taking his silence for an affirmation rather than reluctance. Some things never changed. She wrapped herself rather tightly around him and he began to lead her around the room automatically.

"Felicity?" She refocused on the man in front of her and smiled apologetically. "Would you care to dance?"

"Of course!" She agreed with as much fake enthusiasm as she could muster. She drained her drink and allowed him to guide her onto the dance floor. His hand rested on her hip as she placed her hand in his. He led her through the motions, mercifully silent as he smiled at the dancers surrounding them. She peeked to the side as Oliver and Laurel danced past them.

A low growl rumbled in his chest as he watched  _Dick_ lead Felicity onto the floor and place his hands on her body. Felicity's eyes raised to meet his and held for an impossibly long moment. A sadness lurked within her beautiful blue eyes. He wondered if perhaps she could see the same in his own. He wanted to smile, to ease the tension that flowed between the two of them as they danced with others.

But they don't lie to each other. They never have.

And Oliver knew that Felicity didn't feel like smiling any more than he did. He exhaled as she looked away, both relieved and disappointed that the connection had ended. He watched as she politely excused herself from Richard's arms and headed back to the bar. He briefly considered following her but froze on the spot when she picked up the napkin on the counter and smiled at the bartender.

"Ollie?" Laurel prodded, still in his arms despite the fact that he'd stopped their dancing.

He didn't answer her. Instead he watched as Felicity folded the napkin and placed it in her clutch. Instead he watched as she winked at the bartender and left the room without looking back.

Felicity's footsteps echoed as she descended the stairs. The second lair had yet to feel like  _home_ but the Foundry had been compromised.

No use crying over spilt milk. Or some other unhelpful saying that did  _nothing_ to make her feel better about the situation.

She raised a hand in greeting to the three men who were training across the room from her desk. She dropped her purse on floor and sat down as they all greeted her breathlessly, never ceasing their fighting.

Her fingers were skimming nimbly over her keyboard when Dig moved away from Roy and Oliver and began watching from the sidelines.

"How was your day, Felicity?" He yelled over the sounds of fighting.

Felicity shrugged, never turning to face him. "It was fine. I had lunch with some of my old IT friends."

There was a pause and then Diggle continued, voice full of mischief. "And last night? How was your date?"

Felicity's hands stilled on her keyboard as the two men stopped fighting as well. She blew out a breath and spun her chair to face Diggle, her eyes never straying closer to the training mats.

"It wasn't a date." She hedged, uncomfortable with the scrutiny that his question had caused. She wasn't unaware of the way that the three men were staring at her. Slowly Oliver and Roy started fighting again. Felicity moved to turn back around but Diggle wasn't done.

"Then what was it?" He wondered.

There was the slightest of pauses in Roy and Oliver's movements. Which she ignored.

"Not a date." She told him pointedly through her teeth.

She knew what he was doing. And she knew that he truly believed he was helping. Diggle hadn't been thrilled when Oliver and Felicity had shoved 'Sladegate' under the proverbial rug and 'buried their heads in the damn sand'. It had been a while since he'd instigated though.

"So what would you call it then, Felicity?" He asked with raised eyebrows.

"I'd call it sex, Dig!" She snapped loudly. "Just sex."

His lips twitched skywards at the same time as Roy's fist collided against a  _very_ distracted Oliver's cheekbone.

Her words echoed throughout the room. Shock rippled through him. Images of her writhing beneath a nameless, faceless man barraged his mind, leaving him stranded. A fist knocked him off-kilter and right onto his ass. He blinked stupidly up at Roy before realising what had happened.

His eyes snapped to Felicity who was standing awkwardly by her desk, clearly unsure of whether she should check on him or not. He blinked again. She'd never hesitated before Slade, before Lian Yu.

"Are you alright?" She nibbled on her bottom lip, wishing that the floor would open up and swallow her whole. She shot a furious scowl Dig's way. He shrugged with a grin before moving over to help Oliver to his feet.

Roy stepped away from the two of them and up to Felicity smugly. "So you're finally getting some, huh?" He teased her cheekily.

She shook her head, a snicker passing her lips.

"Anyone we know?" He prodded.

She licked her lips nervously and snuck a glance up at Oliver who was staring at her with hard eyes from where he sat on the med table. Dig assessed the damage and mumbled about concussions.

"Just a guy I met last week at the QC gala. A bartender." She told him, told  _them_.

"A bartender eh?" Roy wiggled his eyebrows. "So you're saying I've got a chance!" He quoted teasingly.

Felicity snorted and flicked him in the forehead. They both pretended not to hear the low growl forcing its way past Oliver's lips.

"Are you going to see him again?" Roy asked seriously, folding his arms across his chest.

"Nope." Felicity replied, popping the 'p'.

Oliver slapped at Dig's hands and hopped off of the table. His fists clenched and he moved back to the training mats. He took his frustration out on the dummy. For every image of Felicity with another man, he raged against the training equipment. His ears strained to catch the rest of their conversation.

"Why not?" Dig asked, joining them.

Oliver's breath caught as he felt her gaze on the back of his neck.

"It was just sex." She repeated again and he cringed, pummelling the dummy as hard as he could manage.

_Oh, we left it all unspoken_

_Oh, we buried it alive_

_and now it's screaming in my head_

Felicity and Oliver wandered through the park together. He kept his gaze on the path. It didn't matter if the sun against her blond curls caused her light to somehow, impossibly  _brighten_. Or that she was wearing that cotton candy lipstick he dreamed about kissing off of her lips. She  _wasn't_ wearing his favorite 'secretary dress' in the nicest shade of blue. Because Oliver didn't  _have_ a favorite dress or lipstick. He  _didn't_.

Neither of them spoke as they spent their lunch break meandering through the public park. It had been so long since they'd done something like this, so he savoured it. Savoured the stolen moments because that was what they had become. Stolen. Before, they had spent all of their days, nights and free time together. His hands were always on her shoulders, her elbow or the small of her back. He gravitated into her orbit whenever she was near, and he felt the pull even when she wasn't. They ate their lunch together and walked when the weather was nice.

But that was before. Now they worked together in the new lair and in the office. They were polite and friendly. She was still the anchor upon which he rested. But he no longer touched her. And they no longer spent their time together. She ate her meals with friends or at her desk. He ate alone.

So he revelled in the moment that she had given him. He struggled to ignore the way that joggers and walkers and  _men_ in general stared lustfully after her as they strolled together in the sunshine. He ignored the possessive monster within him that wanted to wrap her up in his arms and growl that she was  _his_.

Because she  _wasn't_.

A cyclist passed closely to her right and she stepped instinctively closer to Oliver. Her hand brushed against his and a shock of electricity shot up his arm. He shoved his hands into his pockets as she stepped away from him.

She missed him. She missed him all the time.

How was it possible to miss a person so much when they were standing next to you? She spent her work days and several hours each night in his presence. She was the voice inside his ear each night and yet she  _missed_ him.

Her hand twitched at her side and she sighed.

Oliver heard her sigh and he paused to lean against the railing of the bridge. He gazed out at the duck pond as she stood next to him.

He  _missed_ her.

"Can I ask you something?" The question passed his lips before he could stop it.

She titled her head to the side and gazed up at him. "Of course."

He blew out a breath, unsure of how to ask something so… _delicate_. "Why just sex?"

The question was blunt and there was no mistaking what he was alluding to. It was also none of his business. But he'd been agonizing over it for  _weeks_.

Felicity's sharp intake of breath was followed by silence. He stared down at the white knuckles she had wrapped around the railing. He considered taking the question back, apologizing. He just  _couldn't_.

Felicity stared out at the pond, gathering her courage. It wasn't a fair question. It wasn't. And he knew that. It asked everything of her and gave nothing of himself.

"I have nothing else to give." She answered quietly.

Her answer caught him off guard and he spun to face her. His hand gripped her elbow and he waited until she was looking up at him. "You have  _so_ much more to offer than just  _sex_ , Felicity Smoak."

He watched in confusion as she sadly shook her head and pulled her elbow out of his grasp. "I  _know_ exactly what my qualities are, Oliver. Maybe I should rephrase my answer."

She blinked at the moisture gathering in her eyes and glanced away. She inhaled deeply and met his concerned gaze. "I  _should_ have said, that I don't have anything else to give another man."

His brow furrowed as he fought to understand what she was telling him.

"I don't want to love anybody else, Oliver." She reached forwards and placed a hand over his heart. "Do you understand?"

He did. Of course he did. Because he felt the exact same way. He'd spent the last year and a half spurning Laurel's advances. He ignored the various women who vied for his attention, because none of them really  _existed_ when Felicity was around. And none of them mattered even when she wasn't.

"And maybe it's a bit pathetic, because I'm not even sitting around  _hoping_ that you'll just change your mind and one day we can-" She dropped her hand and bit her lip. "Being with somebody else, it wouldn't be fair. Not when I'm in love with you already."

"Felicity." He breathed out, his hand cupping her cheek.

"And this isn't healthy. We left it all unspoken. We didn't talk about it. And now –"

"And now it's screaming in our heads." Oliver finished.

Felicity took a tiny step closer. "Oliver, I don't want to love somebody else."

His thumb caressed her cheekbone as he searched her earnest blue eyes. He sighed and rested his forehead against hers. "I don't want to love somebody else either."

"So what now?" She breathed softly, eyes closing.

"I've built my whole world around you, Felicity." His words fell upon her and she heard the promise behind them. His lips hesitantly touched hers and a tear fell against his fingers. He kissed her adoringly, pulling her closer to his chest.

She pulled back slowly and he opened his eyes. The smile on her lips and in her eyes was the only proof he needed that he'd finally made the right choice. Her fingers tangled in his own and she pulled him over the bridge. As they continued their walk he gazed down at the beautiful woman next to him.

And none of the men in the park mattered. Because Felicity Smoak was finally his. And he would never love somebody else.

_Oh, I built a world around you_

_Oh, you had me in a dream,_

_I lived in every word you said_

_The stars had aligned_

_And I don't wanna love somebody else_

 


	5. SHIVER

_And it's you I see, but you don't see me._

_And it's you I hear, so loud and so clear_

Felicity sat on the stool and leaned her head against the arm that was propped on the bar. Staring down at the drink that she'd made for herself, she pondered the silence that surrounded her. A week ago Verdant had been crowded with Starling City's elite, rubbing shoulders at Moira's electoral party. A week ago Verdant had been the hottest club in town.

Felicity swallowed a rather unladylike gulp of her drink and relished the burn as it made its way down her throat.

Technically, Verdant was now property of Queen Consolidated. Technically, Felicity was trespassing. But QC's CEO was dead and heavily implicated in the crime spree that had terrorized the city mere days before. The very last thing on any board member's mind was foreclosing on Oliver Queen's nightclub.

Felicity reached across the bar and refilled her glass. Scotch had never been her drink of choice, but there was something about the day that called for it. Scotch was the beverage of homecoming victors. It was also the best choice for miserable reflection.

If she was being honest, scotch seemed to be the drink to drown whatever sorrows or joys may come a person's way.

And in the vein on being honest, Felicity wasn't even sure just  _why_ she was drinking.

She had been cleaning out the Foundry, setting all of her computers in order to be relocated. The silence had bothered her as her thoughts raced in memory of the past several weeks. She'd found herself climbing the stairs and raiding the bar almost unconsciously.

She was downing her third scotch, neat, thank you very much, when the echo of heels on linoleum reached her ears. She didn't bother looking up, she'd recognize that self-assured strut anywhere.

"Is Oliver here?" Laurel asked, settling herself on a stool next to her.

"Nope." Felicity replied, popping the 'p'.

The two of them settled into an uncomfortable silence. Felicity sighed and hopped rather clumsily down from the stool. She moved around the bar and poured Laurel a soda with plenty of ice. Pushing the glass forward wordlessly before moving back to her stool.

"Thanks?" Laurel said after a moment, hesitantly taking a sip.

"Yeah well, a bar isn't the greatest place for an alcoholic." If she'd been just the littlest bit more sober, the words probably wouldn't have come out. Then again, they probably would have. She sighed. "That wasn't like a judgment or anything, it's just, aren't you sort of torturing yourself needlessly here?"

"Probably." Laurel conceded begrudgingly.

"How's your father?"

Laurel inhaled sharply. "He's…recovering. The surgery was a little more invasive than I'm sure he'd like but, he should make a full recovery." She paused, her fingers tightening around her glass. "They aren't sure he'll be up to patrolling again."

Felicity nodded. "It's a good thing they gave him his detective badge back then."

Laurel's fingernails tapped against the bar. Felicity scrambled to find a polite reason to leave. It was no secret that the two women had a strained relationship. Laurel had never actually spoken with her in even a civil manner. Felicity felt uncomfortable being around the woman. She reasoned that their mutual feelings for Oliver Queen did little to change that situation one way or another.

"He's really…fond of you, you know?" Laurel added doubtfully as if she couldn't really understand why.

"Your father's a good man. He's been a good friend to me. And his work for the city is heroic." Felicity explained after a long sip of her drink. "I, um, don't think that Oliver plans on coming to the club today."

She realised that her tone wasn't as subtle as it may have been if she wasn't halfway to drunk.

"I'm not actually here to talk to Ollie." Laurel replied after a long moment.

Felicity blew out a breath.  _Ollie._  She hated that name. She couldn't say that the insinuation that Laurel was there to speak to  _her_ thrilled her either.

"You don't really like me, do you?" Laurel's question should have surprised her, but it didn't.

Felicity glanced away from the drink in her hands and up at Laurel's searching gaze. "Not really."

Laurel seemed taken aback by her honesty. "Is it because of my relationship with Ollie?"

Felicity shook her head and drained her glass. "No. It's because I can't recall a single time when you've been even  _polite_ to me. You've always treated me like the help. Unimportant and replaceable."

Laurel's jaw snapped shut at the admonishing and Felicity continued. "I'm in no way threatened by your relationship with Oliver, Laurel. Because the boy you knew is gone. He died on that island. You don't know a thing about the man he is now. You claim to know him better than anyone else, but you don't." Felicity poked her finger in the air, as if to prove a point. "If you did, you wouldn't have been surprised that he was the Arrow. You would have known last year. If you knew him better than anyone else, he wouldn't have spent several months trying to evade your attempts to capture him for a crime he wasn't responsible for."

"And you know him better?" Laurel snapped, voice full of derision.

Felicity didn't bother responding. She was too old to play these games. She'd said too much. Liquid courage tended to be her downfall.

"Why? Because you were his  _assistant_?" Her words were mocking and implied just what  _skills_ others thought Felicity brought to the position.

Felicity slammed her glass on the bar, causing Laurel to jump. She whirled to face the woman, ignoring the way it caused her head to spin. "No, Laurel. Because I'm his friend. His  _partner_. I don't need your approval or to play a game of 'who knows Oliver best' to prove my worth. He trusts me. He needs me. You have absolutely no  _right_ to question my place in his life." Felicity's eyes narrowed. "So why don't we just get down to the reason that you're here, shall we? You're worried that what Slade said was true. Slade said that he took me because Oliver loved me. And that's inconceivable to you, isn't it?"

Laurel gaped at her wordlessly as Felicity felt the rage ebb from her.

"Don't worry about it, Lance. It's every bit as inconceivable to him too. It was a setup. A trap for Slade. And it worked." Felicity felt hot tears stinging the corners of her eyes. She turned away from the love of Oliver's life and stared down at her empty glass. "It was all a lie. He's just as much yours as he was before."

There was silence for several long moments as Felicity fought the tears that were desperate to escape.

"Ollie!" Laurel exclaimed suddenly and Felicity almost fell off of her stool in her haste to turn around. The woman next to her had gotten to her feet and was staring at Oliver. Oliver's gaze however, was burning into Felicity's.

He'd heard. Maybe not the whole conversation, but his eyes told her that he'd heard enough. Felicity dropped her head in dejection and stood heavily. She turned away from him and grabbed the two empty glasses from the counter and rounded the bar. She ignored the charged atmosphere and the feel of his eyes burning a hole in her forehead as she cleaned the glasses.

She knew that the club was no longer theirs, but her mother had taught her to clean up after herself. Her eyes never strayed from her task.

"Laurel was just looking for you, Oliver." She announced, her tone gravelly as she wiped down the bar. She wiped her wet hands on her jeans and reached for her purse. "I'll just leave you to it."

She stepped from behind the bar and cut a wide path towards the dance floor to avoid both Laurel and Oliver's imposing figures. She heard his footsteps behind her and her own feet moved more quickly. She pushed through the front entrance and stopped at the sight of her car.

She'd driven here. She doubted a cab would swing by there this late in the afternoon. She sighed and leaned against the wall of the club. The door she'd just appeared through burst open, Oliver rushing through it. She watched as his head turned left and then right before his gaze settled on her. She bit her lip and watched as a myriad of emotions crossed his handsome face.

"You should probably get back to Laurel." Her tone wasn't snide, but pleading. They'd already had this conversation too many times now. It always looked different but it ended the same way.

Oliver took a step towards her. "I think we both know that she didn't come here to talk to me."

Felicity's eyes narrowed. "Eavesdrop much?"

Oliver had the grace to look embarrassed. "I saw your cars out front and I was more than a little confused as to why the two of you would be here. Together."

So he'd picked up on the mutual dislike the women had shared. Or at least Felicity's part in it. Laurel had been about as subtle as a kick to the teeth.

"Just some girl talk. Bonding, you know." Felicity replied lightly.

" _Felicity_." His tone was serious.

Felicity closed her eyes and counted to ten. Aloud. He stayed very still, no traces of amusement evident when she finally opened her eyes.

"What are the chances that you'll just let this go?" Felicity asked finally.

He took a step forward and she took two back. She knew without chancing a glance that her actions had hurt him.

"I can't do that." He ground out from behind clenched teeth.

"Well." Felicity began. "You should probably have thought about that before telling me you loved me and serving me up as bait to Slade." His eyes snapped to hers, pain flashing through them. "Hey, you wanted to talk about this, didn't you?" He nodded tightly. "It was a great plan, one of your very best. I trust you implicitly and I trusted you then."

She rubbed a hand across her eyes. "If you had just  _told_ me beforehand than maybe we could have avoided this. But you  _didn't,_ Oliver. You just  _played_ me. You played me right along with Slade. Because for a moment there I  _actually_ believed you, Oliver. I  _believed_ you!" Her fist struck out and blew across his chest. "You played upon the very  _real_ feelings that you know I have for you. And you didn't need to. All you had to do was  _tell_ me beforehand. But you didn't." She sniffled and dropped his gaze. "At first I blamed myself for believing it, you know? Because why would  _you_ , love  _me_ , when Gorgeous  _Laurel_ was around?"

"Felicity." He interjected brokenly, but she waved him off.

"But the thing is, it's  _not_ my fault. All you had to do was tell me. And I would've gone along with it. But you didn't. You  _used_ me and my feelings for you to save  _her._ When have I ever given you a reason not to just trust me with the whole truth?" A tear finally escaped and with it the dam broke. "Why are we even talking about this? Can you just go inside and leave me alone? Could you just leave me alone right now? Because I know I was all smiley on the island and 'okay' with it or whatever. But then Laurel showed up and she's just  _such_ a  _bitch_  to me sometimes. And you weren't supposed to hear any of that." She gulped. "And now I've just called the  _love_  of your _life_  a  _bitch_  right in front of you."

She fumbled with her phone for a moment, texting her address to the nearest cab company.

"Felicity, I'm so sorry." He whispered guiltily.

She shook her head fiercely, willing the tears to stop falling. "Don't. Not right now. I'm drunk and not really in the mood for your man pain. I just  _can't._ "

A strangled sound of pain erupted from his lips but she still couldn't quite meet his gaze.

"At least let me drive you home." He demanded softly, his tone lacking any of its usual authority.

"A cab should be here soon. You don't need to wait with me."

His hand shot out and gripped her shoulder. "Will you please just  _look_ at me?" He pleaded.

She chewed on her bottom lip for a long moment before meeting his gaze. His grey eyes were tortured and she felt a pang for causing his distress.

The cab pulled up behind her and the driver honked his horn. Felicity pulled away from his hand, her eyes never leaving his. "I'm going to go home and sleep this off. In a few weeks I'm going to go on a blind date or maybe sleep with a handsome stranger in a bar. And you and I are going to get past this." She ignored the surge of annoyance that crossed his face as she mentioned sleeping with someone else. "We'll put this behind us and be friends and partners again. But Oliver? If you  _ever_ lie to me again or use my feelings against me, I'm done. No second chances, nothing. Do you understand?" She finished coolly.

Oliver nodded tightly, tension rolling off of him in waves.

She stepped past him and towards her cab.

_But you never even see me, do you?_

_And is this my final chance of getting you_

She woke up the next morning and immediately wished that she hadn't. Her hangover was light and manageable. Her fight with Oliver however, replayed on a constant loop in her mind.

"I am  _never_ drinking again." She mumbled into her pillow before dragging herself out of bed and into her shower.

The shower did wonders for the remnants of her hangover. She was no closer to working through the conversations that had happened the day before.

Changing quickly into yoga pants and a comfy sweater, she towel-dried her hair and left her bedroom. She knew that he was there before she saw him. She'd always been eerily aware of his presence, only copious amounts of alcohol had dimmed that the day before.

She raised her eyebrows angrily as he stood from where he'd been sitting on her couch. He was still wearing the clothes from the day before and the dark stubble covering his jawline told her he hadn't gone home. He'd probably arrived right after she fell asleep.

"I'm a jerk." He told her, frowning when she snorted in agreement.

Felicity walked passed him into her kitchen and thawed a tiny bit when she saw that he'd brewed a pot of coffee. She fixed herself a cup before walking back into her living room and sitting on her couch. She folded her legs and sipped her coffee as she waited for his explanation.

Oliver rubbed a hand over his scalp and began pacing in front of her. "I never intended to hurt you, Felicity. I promise."

"Then why did you?" She asked him quickly.

Oliver exhaled loudly. "I didn't mean to. I didn't tell you because I didn't really want to use you as bait in the first place. I spent the whole trip there trying to come up with a different solution. But I couldn't. And then I figured I'd just leave you there, without explanation because Slade would understand what you being there meant. But you're  _you_ , Felicity. And you questioned me and before I knew it, I was _saying_ things that I promised myself I'd never say again."

Felicity glared up at him. "Seriously?"

Oliver shook his head. "I'm not saying what I did was alright, Felicity. I'm not. I was wrong. I should never have taken you out there without telling you why first. I should never have used you as bait in the first place. But I definitely shouldn't have said the things I said."

"Obviously." Felicity mumbled.

"Laurel is  _not_ the love of my life." He swore vehemently.

Felicity rolled her eyes. Whatever. He ignored her.

"I shouldn't have said I loved you, Felicity." Oliver snapped.

"I know, Oliver!" She growled back.

Oliver's fists were clenched. "No you don't!" He yelled. "You don't know! I shouldn't have said I loved you. But not because I knew how you feel about me, or because I don't love you too." He paused, chest heaving, eyes closed. "I shouldn't have told you I loved you, because I  _do_ love you, Felicity." His eyes snapped open and ensnared hers. " _Felicity,_ I love you so damn  _much_ that I should never have led you there in the first place."

Felicity stared up at him in shock.

" _What?_ "

Oliver stepped towards her and dropped to his knees in front of her.

"I'm so sorry that I hurt you. I just, don't know how to do this, Felicity. I just broke up with Sara and Laurel is in on the secret now and my mom just  _died_ and Thea is missing. And I can't  _do_ this right now." Oliver rambled, wide-eyed. "I love you and I have for so long. And I've pushed you away and hurt you and I can't make up for that. I didn't mean to tell you I loved you that night. It just slipped out, the way everything does with you. And then you asked me about it and I'm just not  _ready_ for this."

Felicity glanced away from his feverish gaze down to where he gripped her hands.

"I can't do this right now. I can't be the man you  _need_ me to be, the man you deserve. Not right now. But I can't sit back and watch you believe I don't care about you. Because I do. More than anything." Oliver finished and Felicity met his gaze once more.

"I don't know what to say." She mumbled finally. "Couldn't you have just said all of that on the beach?"

Oliver's lips twitched in self-deprecation. "Take the easy way? When have I ever done that?"

Felicity's thumb swiped against the hand that held her own as she thought over everything he'd said. "You love me? For real."

Oliver nodded.

"We're going to have to work on your communication skills, I think." She pointed out.

Oliver held her gaze. "You usually understand me just fine."

She raised on shoulder in a shrug. He had a point.

"Everything's changed around us. We need time to adapt. And you're right. You were with Sara and things are still complicated with Laurel. So let's table this for now." Her lips tilted upwards and he grinned back hopefully.

She tugged on his hands and he collapsed onto the couch beside her. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her into his side. She closed her eyes and relaxed as his fingers played absently with her drying curls.

"Hey, Oliver?"

He hummed in answer.

"I know you have a lot to process and stuff. But feel free to tell me you love me whenever you feel like it. I promise I won't mind." She promised cheekily.

Oliver barked out a laugh of surprise before dropping his fingers to tickle her ribs. She twisted in his arms and found him looking down at her, eyes alight with rare carefree amusement.

"I love you too, you know." She told him breathlessly. "Just in case it wasn't obvious."

Oliver chuckled and resumed tickling her into submission.

_And on and on from the moment I wake,_

_To the moment I sleep,_

_I'll be there by your side,_

_Just you try and stop me_

 


End file.
